May 22, 2006

Adjust to the environment

You can’t change the world
But you can change the facts
And when you change the facts
You change points of view
–Depeche Mode “New Dress”

All my life, I have always been striving for adjusting to whatever environment where I am in. For instance, the environment in the dormitory is hardly satisfactory to me, yet in order to save money, I must learn to endure all annoyances.

My friend, on the contrary, is an adventurer when it comes to living environments. In order to find a better living place, she moved three times last semester. Even the room she currently dwells in is the best among the three, still she tries to make the place more friendly to her.

I conversed with her the other day, telling her that I might not be able to stay in the dorm next semester. Even though I may need to rent a house, I will find somewhere cheap.

“Woah,” she said, “you always try to change yourself for the environment, while I try to change the environment.”

Perhaps finding an ideal residence is a lot easier than trying to accept the unpleasant things in society. I don’t like using the BBS, but I must force myself to use it in order to keep informed of local events. The current chairperson of our department is rude and self-willed, yet every student must bear with her temper when studying here. I hate Taiwanese society, yet I can never deny the fact that I am part of it.

Throughout our lives, we learn to change our true self, either to yield to the majority, to be “normal,” or to gain interests from the change, or just to “fit in.”

And I thank you
For bringing me here
For showing me home
For singing these tears
Finally I’ve found
That I belong here
–Depeche Mode “Home”

I wonder if there’ll come a day that I finally find somwhere I feels like home, without changing my true nature.